I want you.
Well, I want you most of the time.
The other part of the time I want to violently smack you.
You drive me crazy.
In a few ways, but I'm talking about the actually insane one.
You never tell me anything, so I never tell you anything.
Is there anything even there?
Have I just imagined something in my head?
Is that why I can never truly make up my mind..
Is this love?
Like, don't get me wrong. I love you.
You are incredible. We wouldn't be friends if that weren't the case.
I wouldn't share as much as I have (and had in the past) with you.
I trust you.. even though I sometimes wonder if I really even know you.
Is this what it feels like for everyone around me for me?
Do I ever say anything? Nahh.
I don't see a reason. I'm happy -- annoyed sometimes, but happy
with how things are. They aren't complicated so in all reality, no one
is getting hurt. I'm living my life and you are living yours. What am
I even going on about? You don't even know that I ponder any of these
things.
Am I being too much of a girl?
Yuhh, I think I am. I would even just do a simple slide of a mouse and
delete all of this, but.. this blog is for me. As much as it is for everyone
else but more-so for me. Something that I can look back on and reflect.
ugh..
what do I do?
I know what I will do, I will just forget it.
As soon as I publish it, that will be that.
Okay,
yes. That's how it will be.
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Please don't assume you know anything about this post, you honestly don't. Assuming is just going to make an ass out of yourself. As you can tell by reading this, I struggled with myself to even post this. I'm still pondering it right now. But, back onto subject. Don't assume you know who this is directed to. Don't assume that I'm going to talk to you about this post. I won't. Read it, think about it -- do whatever you want. But, don't talk about it to me or give me advice. I'd come to you if I wanted it. I'm not saying anything else on this matter. Thank you.
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06/19/14
Updated:
That's the thing with crushes.. they never last a long time.
You fight with yourself, trying to decide what you want.
Then you realize how dumb it is that you even felt anything
to begin with. You later learn someone's true intentions
or feelings.. and you are like. Wow, okay. Let me just go
be a cat lady.
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